There are many dating websites that appear to be intended to connect people looking for casual sex. Additionally, many of these sites offer some services for free with the option to upgrade while others offer very little and require the user to upgrade in order to really experience the website. However, many of these sites are also scams; whether they are websites that appear to be legitimate or websites that make no effort to hide their illegitimacy and prey upon the momentary lack of solid judgment that accompanies being really horny.
About.com’s dating expert, Bonny Albo, explains that it might not always be the fault of the sites. “It’s pretty hard for any site these days (especially the big ones) to stop fake profiles and scammers from signing up.” Then there are scenarios in which “a lot of adult dating sites that don’t have a lot of users, or use sneaky marketing tactics like the bait and switch… [the] ads show a bevy of beautiful women in your area, but when you sign up, you realize that the women were just ads that were geographically targeted to your search preferences.”
There are few signs that should be red flags indicating the site is likely a scam. The first is an immediate message. Women can be as promiscuous as men but sex still require some work on the part of the man. While it’s true that the website knows your location based on your IP address and therefore could possibly connect you with women just waiting for someone near them to join the website, it’s highly unlikely. Even if a woman has a profile on a casual dating website, according to AskMen.com, “you still have to interact, show interest, exchange information, and participate in a conversation.”
If you’re looking for sex online and you live outside of the English-speaking world (United States, Canada, United Kingdom, Australia, and New Zealand), there are less options but fortunately, most of the best sites are available internationally. Examples of these are AdultFriendFinder.com, Badoo.com and PoF.com and Passion.com.
With that in mind, there are a few things to consider when looking for casual sex partners on the internet. The first thing is that while they certainly do exist, sites that are intended for meeting sex-only partners and are not scams are the exception. Even those that are not scams will readily tell you in their terms and conditions that not all of the profiles are legitimate.
For examples of this, just look at online dating industry behemoths eHarmony and AshleyMadison.com. According to TechWorld.com, both websites have wording in their terms and conditions indicating that are sketchy. AshleyMadison.com states the website is also “geared to provide you with amusement and entertainment.” This sounds like a great way to justify fake profiles. eHarmony.com clearly states there are fake profiles on the website by stating they “may create test profiles in order to monitor the operation of the Services.”
Almost all casual sex websites are monthly paid subscription sites such as the Friend Finder Network (AdultFriendFinder.com, XMatch.com, FriendFinderX.com). The truth is that these websites are trying to capitalize on one of two things: your horniness or your loneliness. They capitalize on your horniness when they charge for you to click on the sexy, nude profile picture – because there’s a chance that your sprung enough to dish out money to see it. As PsychCentral.com suggests, “it is not difficult for the emotionally needful person to fall into unrealistic fantasy about someone he or she has not even met.” And thus, the website capitalizes on your loneliness.
There are many websites that also try to capitalize on either of these incredibly strong emotional states without ever offering anything in return. As with nearly anything else, remember the old adage, “if it’s too good to be true, it probably is.” However, it’s a great job to do your research beforehand. The Rip Off Report is a reliable website offering reviews on casual sex websites.
This brings us to the point of this post. If you’re having to jump through hoops to find a casual sex partner on the internet, perhaps you’re doing it wrong. Let’s be honest, once sex enters our mind, the last thing we want to do is verify the validity of a half dozen websites, then click through a bunch of profiles we aren’t sure are legitimate, just to have payment required in order to connect. Rather than waiting until you have a hard-on, consider a regular dating site with regular human beings as members and find some time to set up a regular profile. So what are these dating sites?
- POF.com (Plenty of Fish)
- Tinder (mobile application)
Many of these websites, though advertised as legitimate dating sites, have a casual sex aspect to them. Some of the profiles allow users to indicate that, along with other more legitimate options, they are interested in casual encounters, or something similar. However, it’s important to remember that women, typically, are less upfront about their sexual intentions. This does not mean they are less sexually active. In fact, according to Daily Mail, they are even more sexually active than men.
There are indications on profiles of a willingness to have sex casually, even if they don’t come right out and say it. A self-admitted Tinder-user on the website SingleDatingDiva.com gives some hints such as a conversation that quickly turns sexual, conversations only occur at night, or wanting to meet without really knowing you.
In any case, as you probably already know, there is a certain amount of anonymity that the internet allows. Take the advice offered in the Netiquette blog from CNN.com and remember “that whoever just preemptively rejected you is someone you’ve never met.” And furthermore, someone you will likely never meet. This makes it easier after a few minutes of conversation to pop the question. Not that question. This question – “so how do you feel about casual sex?” What’s the worst that can happen? I’ll tell you. The worse that can happen is she will turn you down.
Consider this, a 2015 survey by Marie Claire, as discussed on Bustle.com, found that 1/3 of women watch porn. That means that 1/3 of the women surveyed are on the internet while being horny. How many of those women might also be on dating websites. Furthermore, 41% of the women who watch porn were embarrassed about it. This confirms what we already know, women are less open about their sexuality and therefore less likely to be on sites explicitly for casual sex.
So find them on regular dating sites and start by being a nice guy. Pick through the haystack and find the needle that’s game for casual sex.