If you are a confused guy I would advise you to read the interesting comments found at the video page here:
There are many interesting comments – most disagreeing with the speaker’s short and generalistic views and statements.
I would have to agree with him on the topic of arousal addiction. Media is so easily accessible now in any private location. Both men and women are susceptible to overuse… This usually manifests in social withdrawal which seems to be more apparent in men than women.
On the topic of schooling – I don’t know what happens in other areas of the US but if you design a system (by women) for women then women will outperform men every time.
Feminism gone to far or men simply falling behind?
Is it simply a change in how we are being assessed?
Let’s not jump to negative conclusions based on gender differences… I liked one comment regarding male roles in society. Giving men a reason to turn up and take charge in society and schools would help. Adding more tangible real world examples and exercises in schools.
It’s a complex debate and one that you should be interested in if you feel that arousal “addiction” could be interfering with your ability to relate to women.
Keeping a balanced lifestyle is crucial – in a post titled: no masturbation until you get the girl I suggest just that. Some men have reported that over use of sexual images leads to an inability to orgasm without that artificial visual stimulation.
This is definitely an unnatural product of overexposure and lack of person to person intimacy. Online dating was designed to bring everyone closer together. However some use it to play out fantasies without the intention of ever actually meeting up.
Being alone for any length of time will lead you to the reality of how important family and friends are in your life. If happiness is your goal then empathy, gratitude and close community ties should be your focus.
Rather than removing yourself from society with games and sexual imagery strike a balance between social interaction and alone time. I see nothing wrong with hours of gaming – so long as it’s backed up with hours of close contact and communication with men and women. Sadly hours of gaming is often backed up with hours of isolating shift jobs or long haul flights… How can you sit next to someone for 10 hours and not say a word to them? Have we become so distanced from each other than a simple hello is to much?
As men we need to pick up the ball. We need not fight back against feminism – only listen to what they are trying to tell us. Women just want to be heard and respected.
As men we need to respect ourselves and find PURPOSE in this world.
Then we can respect and serve others.
This talk fails to ask the one important question: why are boys/men running and hiding from “real life” into games, porn and media? The short answer is that they provide some kind of relief that real life does not. Whatever social system we have come to nowadays alienates boys from a very young age, and does so consistently into adulthood, that much is clear. How, why and what to do about it is up for debate.
(har har! men are too stupid to wear socks!!)
(ha ha!!! men can’t cook!!!)
(ha ha!!!! men are bad with money!!!)
(ha haaaa!!! men’s sexuality is worthless!!!)
(har har har!!!! men are horse’s asses!!)
So now, if you actually stand by what you said, you owe me three ads that are currently running on US television that depict women as idiots. Let’s see you come up with those.
Oh and by the way, not only are men depicted as success objects, not only are they viewed as only having worth if they can have sex, not only are they depicted as idiots – but VIOLENCE AGAINST MEN is also depicted as acceptable. Let’s see you find examples from US television of things like this:
Come on. I’m serious. Find me a commercial from US television where a man hits a woman the way the woman in that commercial hit the man.
Here’s a similar example from the UK:
A Comment From Sandra
I love it how people keep analyzing the educational system, the media influence, the gaming industry, and everything else they can so they don’t have to look at the root cause of most issues: family. You want your kids, both boys and girls to be successful in life? Then don’t leave all their education to schools and society, participate in it, like a real parent, not just an spectator.
I happen to be married to a great guy, who by the way is not only a gamer but also works in the gaming industry… he loves his video games, and loved them since he was a teenager, he can spend hours playing his games. He also likes porn (he’s not addicted to it though), as far as I know ;o) But he happens to love books as well, and photography, and he’s a great cook… and most of that I owe to his amazing parents, who encouraged his love for computers and technology, who showed him that cooking was not a burden but a passion, who taught him to love nature and enjoy beauty in life, and who loved him and cared for him deeply. Teachers and society had an influence, and once he was an adult he kept working hard on being a great human being. But the foundation, that one he owes entirely to BOTH of his parents.
It’s not technology, it’s not racism, it’s not the opposite gender, it’s not the education system who is responsible of teenager’s struggle today. It’s our poor parenting, it’s ourselves.