Online Dating !Stigma!
The first thing that has to be said up front is simply this: FILL IT OUT… It’s amazing how many singles (especially guys) do not fill out their profile…
I think there is a deeper reason as to why so many guys are shooting blanks. If guys knew (and they do) that if they added more photos and spent literally 5-10 minutes to check a few boxes they would get more dates… they would!
I think many daters who are on the verge of going online are apprehensive about their personal information being available to anyone willing to sign up to the site….
What would my friends think?
Facebook has made signing up a no brainer as all your doing is connecting with friends… your intention is clear and without motive.
Dating sites have many mixed motives and an ingrained sense of vulnerability.
When you sign up for a dating site you are telling the world that you are lonely and that your life is not quite complete.
For many men this is hard to accept… Telling the world that you are actively searching for a relationship online might be perceived by some to be a weakness.
Some might say –
why cant you find women offline?
Isn’t online dating full of seedy guys?
It is natural to think negatively of online dating at first… But once you sign up to a site like eHarmony or okcupid.com you start to realise that everybody online comes from a good authentic place and it is in fact YOU that is out of place. In time almost everyone who is single will have tried online dating at least once… Even if it was just a sneaky email exchange via an anonymous username.
That’s the big move though is it not?
Going from an anonymous scared “what if” place to being proud, honest and open about looking for love is a big step. Many guys have to much pride to be able to do this and as a result go single for to long.
Online dating profiles get left blank for many reasons:
The what if thought
Hard to edit or find profile buttons
It may even be eagerness to find a single near you! Once you fill out your username, password and email fields you can race straight to the search or online buttons. Search email and leave? Or update your profile… Perhaps the intention of the free online dater was to never fill in the about me or interests section in the first place.
The problem with giving little and expecting a lot is that you tend to get little! If other singles cant see your face and don’t know if your into guys or girls it’s unlikely you are going to get any interest.
So I guess you need to decide before you sign up whether you are really going to go all the way and use the dating site for what it’s meant for.
The stigma that surrounds dating sites such as plenty of fish is:
– The site is ugly and hard to use
– It’s full of weird guys looking for sex
– To many men over 40
– Has to many unattractive singles
The reality is that there is a good mix of normal attractive singles on every site (even eHarmony has unattractive people on it!)
Check local women on okcupid and you should be reasonably impressed by the quality and outlook of the members. You wont find many doctors and lawyers on free online dating sites but there is always VIPsingles if you want to date professionals.
Online Dating Profile Tips
Take Solo Shots
Take Face and Body Shots
Use Quality Images
Take a Variety of Pictures
Update your Photos Regularly
Greeting – Don’t think of it as a school essay. Think of it as fun.
This is your chance to talk about things that aren’t asked in Personal Info.
What makes you different?
What types of things do you like to do?
What type of person are you looking for?
What makes you different from everyone else?
Don’t leave your greeting blank.
Update your greeting regularly.
Check your spelling and grammar.
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