Approaching Women: Trust Confidence And Social Proof

If you are attracted to a women your communication skills often go out the window. You start to get tense and communication mistakes start popping up. If you’re not calm and relaxed when chatting with a women it’s easy to blow it. Here are some mistakes men make when talking to women.

Female Safety:
Women can often seem defensive or even bitchy (ice queen) when you first approach them.
They will likely be very nice talkative girls once you get past this wall. Just remember this is a natural defensive mechanism against all the guys that approach her.

Rather than cold approach her, be introduced by a third party. This increases the trust in you immediately. You when women get approached by random guys they don’t know there is going to be an inherent fear and barrier because she has to protect herself both physically and emotionally.

By dressing well you are able to further increase her trust in you. Honest law abiding men dress well so give yourself the best chance of success and look good.

Social proof is a great way to create immediate trust in women. If everyone else thinks you are good at something then she would be the odd one out if she didn’t. If her friends trust you then she will immediately trust you to. Being great at something like a sport or a great job is often enough.

By opening up your posture and smiling you are letting her know that you have nothing to hide. You are an honest loving man who will not hurt her so show this in your body language when you are talking to her. If you say “hi how are you” to her but your looking at the ground she will immediately question your motives. Eye contact is crucial to connection so hold her eye contact as long as possible.
Congruent Body Language

– Use slow steady movements rather that nothing and then fast jerky arm movements.

When talking to women you will want to keep the conversation away from sensitive topics such as death, women’s issues, and even religion and politics at first.
It’s easy to find out what interests her – just ask. Then focus the conversation on this.

Increase the trust in the conversation by also talking to other women. When your date or “interest” for the night sees you interact positively with other women this not only triggers trust but also a little jealously.

Be active in conversation with other group’s especially dominant male groups. Women will notice you are talking with attractive men.
Women feel safe when you approach them with other friends, especially when they are in a group of friends. Safety in numbers.

Clearly confident body language will also go a long way with women. If you are confident about your ability to chat approach and perform your women will pick this up very early. This does not mean you are arrogant or boisterous. A man can be quietly spoken and still be confident.