Professional photos and the know-how on how to text girls online are the backbones of success on dating sites. Today you’ll learn how to take your texting game to the next level and meet more girls with less effort using a texting system aka the seduction ladder.
In a time when the majority of our communication happens online, excellent texting game is a valuable skill to have.
Nowadays, 1/3 of all relationships already start online. When we take into consideration the constant rise in the number of dating sites and hookup sites currently, its evident why excellent texting game is such a valuable asset.
The biggest hurdle all guys face online is getting any matches at all, and we already talked about how only a small minority of guys succeed at online dating.
But getting a match with a girl you like is only a first stumbling block. The ability to craft memorable and exciting first text to a girl and getting a response back is where the majority of guys fail miserably.
To make matters even worse, getting a response back doesn’t guarantee you’ll be getting a girl on a date face to face.
Peoples attention spans are getting shorter and shorter thanks to technology. Every day we are bombarded with messages and information. The girls especially experience so much noise on dating sites that it’s a real struggle to get a hello back.
Well, this article is all about tackling that problem. Everything you’re about to read comes from personal experience aka lots of failure and frustration.
You’ll learn how to send that first text that’ll make the girl smile and put you ahead of all the other boring and unimaginative guys.
Are you ready?
Interesting profile + strong texting game = Dates
We already covered the importance of choosing the right type of dating site or app for you and the value of unique profile that stands out from the competition. Now you know that great professional photos are a crucial part, one that you can’t skip.
But having an excellent profile is only the first step. It’s the minimum, the baseline. Without it, you’ll have problems getting matches, and your online dating efforts will be a real drag.
To make the best use of your time, energy and effort, you must learn how to communicate with the girls online. Great online text game is what separates guys that get dates and the ones who struggle.
When I was still new to online dating, I was struggling big time. I had problems coming with interesting opening texts, and I didn’t know how to steer the conversations to get the girls on a date. Even when I got a match, I would ruin everything with dull openers I’ve found on the Internet and in the process bored the girls to death.
On the rare occasion when I’ve managed to get the girl to invest in the conversation, it usually didn’t last very long. I would run out of things to say, and soon the only thing you could hear were crickets chirping.
I lacked imagination, and I used the same opening message on every girl I matched. It sounded like a perfect idea I could copy & paste the same message to all girls, and I save a lot of time and energy in the process. Perfect!
Yeah, you guessed it- another complete failure. All in all, I made a lot of mistakes. I didn’t know any better.
I see guys repeat the same mistakes I did, all the time, and after they see no results, they get frustrated and quit online dating altogether.
Great texting game is a precious skill to have today
Let me put it this way.
When was the last time you called a girl on the phone?
To be honest, I don’t even remember when was the last time I called a girl. The majority of our communication today happens through text. Girls especially are glued to their phones, and they are masters at texting. Millenials spend an average of 10 hours a week on dating apps.
Also, every day more and more people use online dating sites. It isn’t a taboo anymore or something you should be ashamed of. It’s considered the regular way of meeting new people for dating and friendships.
More people using online dating means more competition for you. It is not uncommon for girls to have at least five attractive guys they’re texting at the same time. That’s a lot of competition, and you have to stand out somehow.
If your text game is weak, you will have problems getting the girls attention, especially on dating sites. Boring and bland conversations, and used up openers from the internet won’t help you much.
Great text messages have emotional depth. You must hook the girl emotionally with your first message so that she’s compelled to respond back and invest in the conversation. Great opening texts make the girl stop at what she’s doing. -It makes her feel like you took your time to check her out, and saw something that prompted you to write to her.
But before we show you how to text girls online, let’s go through the most common mistakes guys make in online texting.
The Biggest Mistakes Guys Make When Texting Girls Online
Just to be clear, I made all of these mistakes. So did my friends. You probably make them too.
First things first, we already covered it, but if you have lousy photos, you won’t even make it till this point. With bad photos, you don’t stand a chance. You won’t get any matches, at least not from attractive girls. So find good pictures first, if you haven’t already.
Now we’ve come to the second step- Conversations.
Some guys have great profile pictures, great bios, and overall eye-catching profiles. They get matches with girls, but they fail to convert those matches to actual dates – they don’t know how to text girls online properly.
The majority of guys suck at texting girls online because:
1. They are lazy and don’t treat texting game seriously.
They think that they can be lazy just because the girl matched them, so they don’t even try to be creative.
Dull, washed up openers like Hey, Hey, how are you- and Hi, won’t get you anywhere. When girls see a message like that, they either don’t respond, or they delete and block you.
I mean, what do those guys expect. They sound like sad robots.
The only situation when that opener could work is if you are a 10/10 model looking guy. In that case, you can write whatever you please.
But the rest of us, regular mortals with plain and average faces, we have to put in more effort. Laziness costs you dates and sex.
2. Guys lack the imagination to stand out.
They use generic openers from the internet in hopes that it’ll work. The appeal of the perfect magic pill solution is strong. I’ve been in that situation myself, and I didn’t have a lot of success.
Some generic openers work ok, but the majority of them are cringe worthy. The biggest problem is that after a while everybody is using the same generic opener, especially if they sound funny. They spread like wildfire.
I had situations when the girl would accuse me of being the third guy that week with the same opener.
If that happens, you probably wasted your chance with that girl.
The biggest problem with generic openers is that they are too vague. Guys don’t tailor them for a specific girl, and they have issues transitioning further. Generic openers lack context.
Here is the perfect example.
The polar bear opener. I bet you’ve heard it a few times.
It looks perfect on the surface- it’s funny and pretty witty. But look at the reaction from the girl. She plays along at first, and then asks- why do you ask?
The opener doesn’t have any context behind it, and the girl can’t relate to it.
That opener could work like a charm if the girl wrote in her profile how she loves polar bears, or even better, she has a photo of herself in a Zoo, with a polar bear.
3. Guys are playing it too safe, and they forget the goal of texting girls online.
They match with a girl, the girl responds to their opener, and they start chatting. And they chat, and they chat, and they chat. After 10 to 15 exchanged messages, the girl gets bored because your lack the initiative, and she stops responding.
Your goal on a dating site should be to match with a girl, chat her up so that you’re not complete strangers anymore and then invite her out on a date.
Always keep that in mind.
The reason why guys fail at this step is pretty apparent to me now. FEAR.
They are afraid of losing the girl because they don’t usually get a lot of matches. That happens very often, especially if the girl is beautiful.
Guys are afraid to show interest and invite the girl out because they fear the rejection. They play it safe. And playing it safe gets boring after a while. The reason girl matched you in the first place is because she thinks you are somewhat attractive. She expects that you’re going to invite her out.
That strategy usually backfires very quickly when some other guy, with better text game and better plan, comes along and the girl stops responding to your texts.
Well, you can’t blame the girl. You had your chance.
If you stay too long chatting aimlessly, and you fail to steer the conversation to make it more enjoyable, you’ll soon end up in the dreary land.
It’s worth mentioning that some girls love to text, and that it’s their only goal- to waste your time and never meet you in real life. You’ll learn to recognize those attention leeches very quickly. A simple way is to ask them to invest somehow. Ask them for their phone number or invite them directly on a date- they’ll always come up with an excuse.
By following a system I’ve laid out for you, which I’ve personally used, you’ll filter time wasters very quickly. Your goal should always be to find the girls that show high interest and who want to meet on a real date.
4. Guys show too much interest too soon in their text messages
When you show too much interest in a girl too early in the conversation, after only seeing her photos, it looks very needy. You revealed your cards, and now the girl is in a position of power. You’ve placed her on a pedestal.
An even bigger mistake is when guys are overly sexual in their first few messages. When you show sexual intent too soon, the girl reads that as a sign of desperation. The guys who have options are never desperate, and in most cases, they don’t even mention sex while texting girls online.
What’s more important to them is getting to know the girl better to see if she is the kind of girl they would like to spend their time with. It’s a total opposite mindset from the one where you send overly sexual messages in the hope that you’ll cross paths with a girl as desperate for sex as you.
Girls only chase guys they see as better than them in some way. Guys they see as the prize to be won. It’s an unwritten natural law. But, it’s the absolute truth and girls will rarely admit it.
To be seen as the guy who’s worth chasing you must change your mindset. See yourself as the prize. Stop pursuing girls entirely and do the opposite. Make them invest in the conversation and screen them for the qualities you deem worthy. Only then you’ll be seen as the prize and girls will treat you differently.
That’s why the seduction ladder technique you’ll learn is so powerful. It’s a tool that helps you stand out on the girl’s radar and also enables you to present yourself as an attractive guy, who shows interest in a girl but not in a needy and desperate way. Basically, you screen the girl and make her invest in the conversation, and in the process weed out the uninterested girls.
5. Guys respond to messages too fast.
Just think for a second, what kind of message are you sending to the girl if you respond to her texts too fast. It looks like you are glued to your phone and the only thing you have going on in your life is messaging girls on dating sites. It seems pretty weak if you ask me.
The high-value guys have other more important things to work on in their life. They’re too busy chasing their goals and working on their mission. Maybe they also hook up with other girls because they have options. As a result of their busyness, they text girls online when they find the time.
So, the next time you receive a message from a girl, take your time to respond. If you are busy, you’ll do this naturally.
Waiting to respond serves you in two ways. By taking your time to answer, you have time to think about the things you’re going to write.
Your every message should have a purpose. This way you’ll avoid getting stuck in the boring chit-chat.
It also shows the girl that you are busy in your life and that you’re not so readily available. People appreciate more the things that are scarce, and not so easily accessible, the stuff they have to work for to get.
Make the girl work for your attention.
So, if a girl responds to your opening message, it means it worked, and you’ve caught her attention. Next step is to slow your roll and don’t be afraid to message her a little bit later. If it takes her 3 hours to get back at you, you take 5 hours to respond. Never respond immediately. It maybe seems banal and unimportant, but it helps.
The Importance of Having a System for Texting Girls Online
Now that you have an excellent profile with your best photos, and you’ve learned what mistakes to avoid when texting girls online, you are ready for the next step.
Now you are in a situation where you should already be getting some matches. But getting a match with a girl is only half of the battle. Match with a girl doesn’t mean that the girl will automatically meet you in real life.
Remember that. When you match with the girl, you are still a complete stranger to her. She knows how you look based on your photos and that’s it. You are just one guy of many that are contacting her. She didn’t invest in the conversation yet.
For me, that was the step where I would usually get stuck. I would get a match and soon after that lose the girl because of my inability to hook her with my opening message. Even if the girl responded to my first opening message, I would still lose her attention because I lacked the knowledge of how to escalate and connect emotionally.
That’s why having a system for texting girls online, you can follow and refer to makes it so much easier.
I use a simple system called Seduction Ladder or easier to remember AIDA. Aida is a copywriting technique used in marketing for a simple purpose- to get readers attention, pique their interests, lead them to make a decision and finally to invite them to take action.
I analyzed all of my messages and saw that the best-performing ones were following the AIDA technique. It was a real revelation, and I’ve continued to use the method in my online conversations to this day.
The seduction ladder serves as a system you can refer to whenever you feel stuck, or you’re not sure how to proceed.
You need to spot where you are in the process with a particular girl and follow the system.
Seduction ladder system helps you stand out with a great opening message. It also helps to hook the girl into a conversation and make it 50-50, where girls invest back.
Seduction ladder system is particularly helpful when you’re getting a lot of matches. It’s easy to forget or mix up where you’ve left off with any particular girl. With a system, all you have to do is to spot where are you in the system currently, and proceed from there on.
Now comes the fun part.
The system for texting girls online – step by step- from getting a match to date- set up successfully
1. Getting your first match
Now that you have a well-optimized profile with great photos, you should be getting some matches.
The number of matches you get will vary, and depend on a few key factors.
- Great Photos
Again we are back to our photos. If you are using Tinder and you aren’t getting any matches after 100 swipes, it’s time to reassess. Something isn’t right, and the problem is probably in your photos.
If you have problems choosing the best photos, you have a few options.
You can ask your friends, male or female; it doesn’t matter, to give you an objective opinion on your photographs. Sometimes we are too subjective, and we think a photo is great when in reality it isn’t.
Another option is to use a website called PhotoFeeler.com. I’ve used it personally. It’s an excellent way to get honest, objective feedback from real people.
You upload a few of your photos to the PhotoFeeler, and real people rate them. The best part is they describe the way they perceive you in the images by giving them attributes like- confident, shy, attractive, trustworthy, etc.
The users also usually leave you short notes and give you their opinion on how to improve your photos.
Your location plays a significant role in the number of matches you receive. It should be pretty obvious, but if you are living in a smaller city or more rural area, your options may be limited.
Bigger cities mean more people using online dating. It’s just how it is.
If you love to travel some apps are much better choice than others. On Tinder for example, if you are using a Tinder Plus, you have the option to change your location. That comes in handy when you know you’ll be in a particular city in advance, and you want to meet women for dates. You can swipe and get matches from that city or country before you even travel there. Then you meet them when you arrive.
Also, it’s worth mentioning- it’s easiest to meet girls when you are a traveler. They see you as a passing fun and don’t treat you as seriously. That means they are much more open to casual sex and quick and passionate affairs.
3. Your Age
Your age also plays a role in the number of matches you are getting, or not getting. If you are in the 18-30 crowd, your best bet is to use Tinder. Tinder attracts a younger crowd, and it’s less serious than dating sites like Badoo and OkCupid.
The fact that you’re 30 or over doesn’t mean at all that you can’t meet girls there. You can. It just means that after 30 your priorities may be a little bit more serious than casual hookups. But, if that’s not the case, go ahead. You can meet girls that look for something more serious on every dating site. It’s just a question of how much energy and time are you willing to spend.
If you are over 30 and you find you have problems getting matches, there is a nice trick you can use. With Tinder Plus, which is a paid option, you can remove your age from your profile. So, if you are serious, you might invest in Tinder Plus and give it a go.
According to the online surveys, women find 80 % of men on the dating sites unattractive. Also, they’ve found that men get on average 7% response rate per 100 swipes. That, of course, is an average rate, which means that some guys get a much higher rate, while others don’t get any matches at all.
Overall, Expect to get 3-4 matches per 100 swipes in the beginning, until you perfect your profile and find the photos that work the best.
When you start getting your first matches, you are at the second step in the seduction ladder.
Now it’s time to craft a perfect opening message, individually crafted for the girl you matched.
2. How to write a great Opening Message when Texting girls Online
The second step is what makes or breaks your whole strategy. Now you are in a situation where the girl checked out your profile, and she liked what she saw.
Now the next step is on you. It’s rare that the girl will open you first, but it happens.
To avoid all confusion remember it as a rule – the burden of conversation is 100% on you.
You are the man, and you should always start the conversation first.
I found from experience that the best performing openers, with the most significant response ratio, are the ones that are very relevant to the girl.
How to Craft a perfect opening text message
We’ll cover a few different ways to come up with best possible opener, but for now, have this three rules in mind.
The first opening message must be:
- relevant to the girl in some way
- open-ended and written in a way that invites the girl to respond
- it shouldn’t be too long or too short
Now that you have that in mind, it’s time to come up with the opener. I call this stage searching for the gold.
Look at the girl’s profile and try to spot at least two things you can comment on, make an observation on, make an assumption, challenge her on, or tease her about.
It doesn’t have to be anything special. Look for the details.
- Whats the location where the girl took the photo
- is there any animal in the picture?
- Is she wearing something unique, or something that stands out in some way? Maybe a t-shirt with a funny logo or slogan?
- Is she in a foreign country or an exotic location?
- is she showing off some hobby of hers- singing, photography, dancing?
- is she eating something that looks delicious?
You get the point. The girl’s bio can also be an excellent well for information and conversation starters. Usually, girls like to put their favorite song, book or quote on their profile bio. If you can relate to her interest somehow, that’s an excellent way to start the conversation.
Now let’s look at a few examples of the things you can use to start the conversation. In these examples, you’ll see what I mean when I say “look for gold.”
Here we have a girl that sits on a horse and drinks something that looks like alcohol. The photo is quite funny, and it gives you a chance to come up with a witty opener.
As a first opening message you could send something like this:
Whoa whoa, young lady, isn’t that too much horsepower for you to be drinking and driving? 🙂 You look like a girl who loves a good adventure, of course, if you don’t fall asleep in the meantime … I bet there’s an interesting story behind this photo.
The opener is simple, funny and relevant to the girl. The best of all- it’s open-ended, and the girl will be compelled to answer back.
Also, we gave her a slight compliment by calling her adventurous, but at the same time gave her a little neg by assuming she is a drunkard. There’s a big chance that she’ll at least laugh.
Now that you know what to look for and you’ve found the girls gold, there are a few different ways in which you can make that first message more appealing.
How to make your first opening text more appealing?
- You can tease the girl and make fun of her but keep it on the positive note.
- You can project something onto the girl or make an assumption. It doesn’t even have to be correct. The goal is to make her respond to our opening message.
- If you have the same or similar interests, you can comment on that and ask her a question about it. People love to talk about themselves and especially about the things they’re passionate about. The key to being an excellent communicator is to ask the right kind of questions and listen. But always try to use more statements than questions in your texts.
- You can challenge the girl somehow. If she is playing some sport in her photos, challenge her to a duel.
- Make her curious, so she wants to know more.
You can write an open-ended comment, that’s a little bit vague. You want the girl to scratch her head from confusion and curiosity. Confusion is better than boredom.
- A funny and a handy way is when you’ve spotted that she listed her favorite artist in her bio. Just start a song, write the first verse and leave it at that. In most cases, the girl will play along and continue the song. If you can show the girl that you have the same interest, in anything, she’ll immediately feel more inclined to respond to your message. People are always drawn to other people who have similar interests. It’s some tribal relict from our prehistoric times. We love to be a part of the same tribe. We like to belong.
- Another exciting way to start the conversation is to reverse the roles. Every girl expects the guy to make the first move and generally to be the one who chases her. But one way to circumvent that and present yourself as a prize from the beginning in a funny way is to put her in a position of a chaser.
To do this, you could open her with: So, where are you taking me on our first date?
It’s funny, it’s playful and makes the girl think of the two of you in the future. It’s like you skip the part where you ask her for a date, and the fact that the two of you are going on a date is assumed.
Also, if the girl responds you’ll be able to see if she has a sense of humor and, how creative and imaginative is she.
Now that you know how to craft that perfect opening message, here’s some additional info on what you should avoid at all cost in your first message.
What to Avoid When Texting Girls Online
Avoid popular pickup lines and openers
Never use generic and used up pickup lines from the internet. They tend to go mainstream very fast because a lot of guys are afraid to use their brain. Also, they won’t help you later to carry on a decent conversation. Better practice your style and humor. You should always be yourself anyway.
Don’t be rude
Never send the girl something negative, rude or mean because you’ll never get a response back. Even if you get a response, it will be a girl who is very negative herself and who loves drama. It’s better to avoid those kinds of girls if you don’t love problems in your life. But, if you like that kind of stuff, be my guest.
Don’t confuse being mean and confrontational with being sarcastic, challenging and teasing her a bit. It’s ok to be a challenge and play hard to get. But it should always be playful and on a positive note.
That’s why girls love jerks. They tease them, make fun of them and treat them as little girls, and they love them for it. As David DeAngelo, a famous dating coach named it: be cocky and funny, not rude.
Don’t mention Sex too early
Don’t mention sex at all in your texts unless you are a 10/10 in looks guy and you have girls opening you first. Sexting has its place and time but mentioning it too early can cost you.
Guys who pester girls with sex talk too soon appear creepy and desperate. Not to mention the fact that you can quickly end up somewhere on the internet as an example of how not to text girls online.
You’ll have plenty of time to send sexy messages later when you transition from the dating app to mobile messenger. Even then you should be careful and avoid making the conversation too sexual too early. Especially before the first date, because it puts too much pressure on the girl.
If a girl wants to be sexual, she’ll let you know. Flirty is ok, as long as you don’t overdo it.
Stop Overusing Emojis
This is like the plague of the millennial generation. They use too much emojis and end up looking like teenage girls. Sending a meme or a funny gif certainly helps if it’s used in the right context and at the right time. But using too many smiley faces is just plain unattractive.
Would James Bond ever send a message like this? :))) 😛 You should always strive to be authoritative and concise in your words. They should look like a real man, a leader wrote them.
Now that you’ve sent your opening message, the next step is to wait for a girl’s response. Of course, you aren’t going to wait by the phone for an answer. You’ll be messaging your other matches.
The online game is a numbers game in a way. The more girls you match, the better are your chances of finding a girl willing to meet you on a date.
3. Wait For the Girl to Respond to Your Opening Text
Now we are at the third step in the seduction ladder.
This step is when you wait for the girl’s response. You’re gauging her interest in a way. She matched you, so she already likes something about you. When she reads your message, crafted especially for her, that’s when you’ll have her full attention.
The most critical step is to wait until the girl responds. Never send a second text. The double text is a kiss of death in the online game. It reeks of desperation and neediness.
Three possibilities can happen at this step.
1. The first possibility is the girl not responding to your message at all. That happens in the online game all the time. The girl matches you and then ghosts. Read that as disinterest and forget about her.
But sometimes girls get a lot of attention from guys, especially good looking girls. Their inboxes are full, and they don’t see your message immediately. That’s why it’s important to be patient and never send two texts in a row.
Sometimes girls will get back to you a week or so later. So, if a girl doesn’t respond to your opening message, but you like her for some reason, you can send her another message in a week, to check if maybe you’ll get her attention this time. But the chances are slim, and you are better off trying your luck with another girl.
2. The second possibility is that the girl will respond to your message, but she doesn’t seem hooked and engaged. I call this type of girl- a maybe girl. You got her attention, and she responded to your opening message, but you haven’t quite hooked her properly, so she doesn’t invest a lot in the conversation.
Usually, you’ll recognize this girl by her responses. The responses are generally something like LOL, haha, or some other variation of short answer. Yes, no, maybe type of response.
You can work with this. You go back to the step two and find another gold. Try to find another conversation starter and make it more emotional.
You can even hook her by writing something outrageous, being sarcastic, asking her a direct question or calling her out on being the worst texter in the world. Of course funnily and positively. Never show that you are butthurt and keep the conversation on the positive note. You are just a guy that loves to have fun and joke around.
3. The third possibility is when the girl responds to your message, and she’s invested in the conversation from the start. Maybe she laughs at your opener and asks you a question back. That’s a significant indicator of interest, and you are free to proceed to step 4.
Now you have a girls attention, and she showed interest back. Keep the conversation flowing and not screw things up.
To never run out of things to talk about look for seed keywords in girl’s responses. If you look carefully you’ll see that every sentence contains some words that can be a great conversation starter. That way it’s practically impossible to run out of things to say.
Again, remember your goal. Exchange max five to ten messages and try to escalate. Escalating in this context means asking for a phone number and texting the girl on WhatsApp.
How to Transition from the Dating Site to WhatsApp?
A big mistake a lot of guys make is staying far too long on the dating site. Getting the girl to accept to meet you on a date directly from the dating site won’t always work.
It all depends on the girl and how much comfort and connection you’ve established.
That’s why it’s the best to treat dating sites and apps only as tools to help you break through the ice and get on the girl’s radar.
As a general rule, five to ten messages is more than enough for the girl to get an idea of the kind of guy you are.
Staying on a dating site for too long works counterproductive and it’s easy to lose the girls attention. Especially if you are texting a hot girl who has an inbox full of messages from thirsty guys.
Inviting the girl on WhatsApp serves you twofold.
a) You are screening the girl’s interest level from the get-go. Girls that are not so hot for you will in most cases throw an excuse your way.
- I don’t give my number to strangers,
- I want to get to know you better before giving you my number.
You should read both situations as low-interest from the girl and stop investing in the communication. If the girl’s excuse is legitimate, she’ll contact you again. If not, you saved yourself valuable time to meet girls that won’t waste your time.
b) It helps make it more intimate
If the girl gave you her number, it means she’s somewhat interested in you and would like to chat with you more.
Now you have the girl one on one which helps to create more comfort.
But what to say to ask her for the number?
I’ve found from experience that it works the best to come up with an excuse to move the conversation away from the dating site.
You can say that Tinder eats away your battery. Another good one is that you’re on the job at the moment and your boss isn’t too fond of you wasting time on dating sites. Or how you are busy working now but would love to resume the conversation later.
How to Text Before The First Date?
Now you’ve got the girls number and moved the conversation to WhatsApp.
The fact that you’ve got the girls number doesn’t change the ultimate goal- to schedule a real date.
That’s where guys again go wrong, and they make mistakes as texting the girls on WhatsApp too much. The idea is to exchange few more messages and propose a date. The date doesn’t have to be anything fancy-simple drink works wonders.
I’ve found that eight to ten messages are enough after which you can invite the girl on a date.
Make it simple for the girl- say how she seems interesting -or some other attribute you find attractive, and tell her you would love to meet her for drinks to get to know her better. Then ask when she is available this week.
Girls who are available and interested in you will pick a day and make your life easier. Or you can propose the day and ask her directly.
Avoid these mistakes when texting a girl before the first date.
- don’t be needy and text her the whole time
Yes, girls love texting, but too much of a good thing ruins the mystery and anticipation of the first date. You don’t want to give an impression that you don’t have anything more important to do than text her the whole day. Leave something for the date.
Don’t be like all the other thirsty and desperate guys. She’ll thank you, trust me.
- always add value and make your messages purposeful.
Texting girls work best for making definitive plans and handling logistic. There’s no reason to write long walls of texts describing the meat sandwich you just ate for lunch.
- use more statements and fewer questions
to make your messages value adding, always use more statements and fewer questions.
How to Text in Between Dates?
I remember I heard this advice from a famous YouTube dating coach Corey Wayne- to let the women do the chasing after the first date.
Letting women do the chasing sounds pretty appealing, but how do you do it?
At this point, the first date is behind you. Luckily you’ve had a fantastic time and left a good impression on the girl. Also, you’ve had an opportunity to get to know the girl better and decide if she a good fit for you.
Now it’s time to let the girl work a little for your attention. If she’s impressed by you and she liked you in person, she’ll probably contact you first. And that’s a significant signal of interest.
That’s why its best to keep texting to a minimum after the first date and give the girl an opportunity to invest back.
If you can’t help yourself and you must text her, restrict yourself to send only value-adding messages.
You can send her:
Funny memes and photos to make her laugh
We all need more laughter in our lives. And is there a better way to make someone’s day then sending them a meme that’ll make their pants wet.
Use voice messages in WhatsApp
Voice messages are powerful. Nobody uses calls anymore, but there’s no denying the fact that voice is an essential element in seduction. There is no better way to get her attention and make her think about you between dates than surprising her with a voice message.
Hopefully, she’ll return one to you, and you can banter back and forth a few times. Use the opportunity to invite the girl on the second date.
Send a photo of yourself doing something interesting.
But don’t force it. If you happen to experience something memorable and manage to catch the moment in the photo, you can share it with the girl. It’s an excellent way to stay in her mind till the next date.
Overall, always be aware of the situation and don’t force things. Let the girl do little work this time.
How to Recognize Flakes and Attention Whores from Interested Girls?
The fact is that online you’ll encounter many girls who don’t have any intention to meet you in real life.
All girls love attention, but some crave it. They will happily string you along, and keep the conversation going when in reality they’re just wasting your time. They are feeding their ego in a nutshell.
On the other hand, some girls will seem interested at first. They’ll text with you, banter with you, exchange numbers with you and even agree to a date.
In the end, they’ll flake on you with a funny excuse or sometimes straight disappear altogether.
The ability to recognize these kinds of girls and quickly to stop all communication with them is what separates successful guys from unsuccessful ones.
It’s much harder to recognize a girl that’ll flake than the girl who loves attention. But that’s the name of the game. It happens.
But the girls that love attention are much easier to recognize.
They’ll often take their time to answer your texts. Then they’ll return all of a sudden and seem very invested in the conversation. They will ask you questions and give you hints to invite them for a date. Then when you propose the date, they will disappear.
When a girl takes a long time to answer back, but you can see that she’s still online, she’s probably texting a bunch of guys all at the same time.
With practice, you’ll learn to spot time wasters very quickly, but you won’t be able to avoid them altogether.
How to Use Social Proof to Meet Girls Online
To meet hot girls on dating sites and successfully get them on dates you need to learn how to text girls online. But sometimes even the best texting game isn’t enough to get hot girls attention.
If you’ve ever seen a hot girls inbox, you know what I’m talking about. Their inboxes are in most cases full to the brim, and they get overwhelmed with a sheer volume of messages they receive daily.
That’s where social proof can help you tremendously Especially if you’re texting hot girls online with little to no success.
For you that are not familiar with the term social proof- it’s one of the building blocks of your sexual market value.
Sexual market value is consist of different elements like :
- your job
- your attractiveness
- your status in society
- and social proof
In a nutshell, it’s when other people preapprove you.
For example, think Dan Bilzerian. When he posts on Instagram photo surrounded by 20 hot girls, he has a substantial social proof.
Of course, you and I will never have as strong social proof as Dan, but there are few things we can do to help ourselves when we text girls online.
If your social proof is strong, you’ll have girls texting you first on dating sites. But this is something you can’t fake. You ‘ll genuinely have to put in the time and effort the create a great social proof.
1. Connect your profile on Tinder (or other dating sites if it’s possible) with your Instagram account.
Of course, this assumes that your Instagram account has at least a thousand follower’s and great photos to begin with. The power of Instagram is that the girl can quickly see that you are an attractive man with exciting life. You have friends, and you’re not a serial killer.
There’s a good thread on Roosh V forum talking about how to build your Instagram account to meet girls online.
2. Invite girls on Snapchat
A lot of younger girls today use Snapchat, and you can use that to your advantage if you’re not shy of recording short Snapchat videos.
for you unfamiliar with Snapchat read this—link
Snapchatting works best for after you’ve got the girls number. Ask her if she uses Snapchat and add her. This way the girl will watch your stories, and you’ll be on her mind. You got her attention.
It’s like a window into your life. The girl can see what kind of man are you, and if she likes what she sees getting her on a date will be a piece of cake.
Do you need social proof to meet girls online?
Of course, this is not necessary. It’s just a tool that’ll give you an advantage when you’re texting game isn’t enough. Especially for the hottest girls on dating sites.
You can successfully meet girls and get them on dates by having only great profile and strong texting game. That’s what this article is all about after all.
How to Progress to Sexting and When?
Sexting is sending or receiving explicit, sexual photos in text messages. It’s certainly useful in some situations, but some guys got it all wrong. It’s a valuable tool for couples in long-distance relationships that are physically far away from each other.
But sexting as your opening message or even worse, sending dick pics as your opening message won’t make the girls fall deeply in love with you. On the contrary, you may get blocked and deleted.
Even if the girl is looking for a casual sex partner, she’ll want to get to know you first.
Rather than sexting from the get-go, it’s better to start the conversation slowly and then be flirty if the situation warrants it. The social awareness is essential here. You must learn to read the girl and react appropriately.
Not all girls love to send their sexy photos on dating sites. Of course, there are exceptions. Some girls are more sexually open than others. There are girls on hookup sites that search strictly for sex, but they will give you clear signals if they want to take the conversation on the next level.
Best Dating Sites to Practice Texting Girls Online
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As you can see, texting girls online is a skill you can get better at. By using a proven and repeatable system you can drastically increase your success rate, and get more dates with less effort and time spent.