Having Public Sex – Why and Where (The Ultimate Guide)

public sex


If you are looking to mix-up your sex life and you have exhausted the different places at home where you can have sex, like the bedroom, the shower, the couch and even in front of the kitchen sink when she was washing dishes and you couldn’t help yourself, perhaps it’s time to take sex outside of your home.

Reasons to Have Public Sex

According to Women’s Health, Emily Morse, Ph.D., a relationship expert, “having sex outside of the bedroom can bring you closer to your partner, teach you about what turns you on, and help you feel sexually empowered.”

For men, it’s a little more straightforward. Perhaps there is an element of feeling closer to their partner but the biggest satisfaction might be awakening their inner porn star. In an article from Forbes, the average guys perception of the male porn star is described as “unequivocally, undeniably male – so literally, one depends on one’s manhood to do it. This is what you are paid for as a male porn star: to be a man.” Never mind that the article goes on to describe the many downsides of the profession. The fact remains that it is a dream job and having sex is obscure places is part of that job.

If you and your partner have discussed having sex outside of the bedroom, you’re not alone. In fact, as described in a Your Tango article, the well-known sex toy company, Adam & Eve conducted a survey of 1,000 adults and they discovered that 52% of adults admit to having sex in public! The same article quotes sex, marriage and family therapist Dr. Kat Van Kirk as saying “sex in public can add a sense of adventure to routine lovemaking habits.”

Another reason for why couples might have sex in public is the thrill of possibly getting caught. Most reasonable people would balk at the notion of being watched while having sex. However, having sex in a place where someone might see them is something entirely different. A sexuality expert on About.com explains: “For some people being seen isn’t the important part, it’s just the possibility of being seen. For others it may specifically be the knowledge that a stranger is watching them have sex that turns them on.” Rather than being outright exhibitionism, it’s a sort of reluctant exhibitionism that would better describe someone wanting to have sex in public.

A similar perspective is offered from a firsthand experience in an article from Elite Daily. The very detailed description of the encounter comes with this moment of insight: “This is the whole point of having sex in public: to get (or almost get) caught, and for that adrenaline to fill your synapses and let you show other people what it’s like to keep on living.” In this case, the public sex was said to be random and with a stranger, rather than with an established partner. This could be much more difficult as there might not be time to plan for an exit strategy.

Where to Have Public Sex

Your Car

With the reasons to have sex covered, it’s time to consider the ideal places for public sex. Easily the most common place to have sex in public is your car because it still offers a degree of privacy as well as the best exit strategy: drive away. Additionally, the windows still leave the opportunity for someone to catch you and your partner in the act. Finally, sex in your car, if it’s parked, presents a scenario in which you are the least likely to get into legal trouble. This is because most legal trouble will be related to lewdness or someone actually seeing you, which is slightly less likely in a car. Because it is the easiest, it is also the most popular. According to a Cosmopolitan survey, 80% of respondents fantasized about having sex in the car.

An Elevator

Elevators might not be as popular if it weren’t for many a steamy scene in an unknown number of movies in which a couple makes the most of a few moments alone in an elevator. Another reason why elevators are popular spots for public sex is because they are often on the way to a hotel room the couple will knowingly engage in sex. In this case, they sometimes just can’t wait. From a personal account in Men’s Fitness, “the tension was insane, so we headed back to his room—but we didn’t even make it upstairs. We got it on in the elevator!” There is also the emergency stop button. While using this is iffy as it might alert emergency services such as the fire department or an ambulance, it would buy you a few more minutes alone in the elevator.

The Park

The same Cosmopolitan survey mentioned above also found that 42% of respondents to their survey fantasized about having sex at the park. While offering less privacy, a park does appeal to those interested in connecting with nature. The lack of privacy can also be a reason why some people might choose to have sex in a park.

There are many parks around the world which are known for being places where people have sex. One of those places is Puttenham, England. A walk through a certain field in the sparsely populated town reveals mats on the ground left for subsequent trysts as well as used condom wrappers and the related. Some people living in Puttenham are aware, and as one older resident was quoted as saying in the New York Times, “Honestly, it’s been going on for so many years. I think we should just let them get on with it.”

At an Event

Weddings have long been places where people have sex outside of the bedroom. While not exactly public, it’s certainly not your bedroom. The bathroom at wherever the reception is held is the most likely place. Helped by alcohol that might be served, your liquid courage increases the chance of a romp at a wedding. While perhaps overstated in movies and media, there is something about the romantic nature of a wedding that lends itself to public sex at a wedding.

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