How Can I Use Social Media to Meet Women?

Everyone is on social media these days, which makes it a good place to find women to date. The key is knowing how to use it.


Social Media Rules

Society has unwritten rules that you must follow to be accepted, and social media is no different. When it comes to meeting women, you'll want to make a good first impression.

You wouldn't go out to meet women in public with a dirty t-shirt on and your hair uncombed. You make sure you are presentable. Your social media should be presentable as well to successfully pick up girls.


Social Media Rules

  1. Choose photos wisely
  2. Avoid inappropriate posts
  3. Flirt in public, but not too much
  4. Be careful what you say in private
  5. Show your interests and personality

Choose Photos Wisely

If you already have a social media account (and who doesn't?), you'll need to go through your old photos and follow this rule when adding new ones.

To put it simply, post flattering photos. Photos that make you look attractive physically are great. Do not post bathroom selfies or "I've been partying all night and now I have a hangover" shots.

Don't post any shirtless pics unless you have a reason to be shirtless. The beach is a good example. Make it look like you just happened to be shirtless in the pic, not like your saying "hey look at my sexy body".

You'll also want to use your pictures to show the type of man you are. If family is very important to you, you will naturally have photos of you with your family.

Photos of you hanging out with a group of friends are good, as long as it isn't your main profile photo. Photos of material things (nice cars, motorcycles, boats, etc.) should be kept to a minimum.

Show, Don't Tell

Use your photos to express who you are. Show your personality. What's important to you. What you enjoy.


The better way to show your value and status is with vacation photos. Pictures of you in exotic locations gives the impression that you are well travelled, cultured, and high status.

Photos of your hobbies are great too. Use your photos to tell your story. What you like, what you value, who you are.


Avoid Inappropriate Posts

On some sites, like Facebook, you can create groups and decide who sees what. If you must share offensive memes with your friends, use this feature so that they aren't on your public profile.

The better option is to avoid them altogether. Don't post anything that you wouldn't feel comfortable saying or sharing on your first date.

This includes things that could be considered inappropriate and offensive as well as ranting about your ex or who you slept with last night.

Keep it positive. Be yourself but avoid posting too much negativity. Highlight the parts of your life that you are happy with.

Perhaps even more important, do not whine about being lonely! 

It screams desperation, which is one of the most unattractive things you can be.

Flirt Carefully

It's ok for girls to see that you talk to other girls, and even that you flirt with them a bit. However, too much flirting can make you look like you are either a player or taken.

Keep the flirting light and make sure that you aren't flirting every time you make a comment.

Private Messaging Isn't That Private

Remember that anything you put into writing, be it a Instagram DM or a text message, could find its way into public knowledge.

In the age of screen shots, there is never a guarantee that your private conversations will stay private. And while screenshots can be faked, they are usually seen as concrete evidence that you said what it says you did.

Keep this in mind and try not to say anything in private that you don't want to see the light of day.

Show Your Interests and Personality


Use social media to give girls an idea of who you are. You naturally do this with the posts you make,who you follow, the posts you like, etc.

Try to step back occasionally and view your social media from the perspective of someone who doesn't know you.

What overall picture do you create? Do you seem interesting? Do you have an active social life?

Do you have hobbies and opinions that you are passionate about?

These are the things that your profile should be conveying through your everyday interactions on the site.

Who Are You?

What does your overall social media profile say about you?

What does it convey about who you are?

Does it present you in a positive light or a negative one?

Meeting Girls On Social Media

Now that you've tweaked your social media feed to make yourself more attractive, or at least less offensive, it's time to put it to use.

There are a few ways to meet girls on social media. Basically you can join groups, conduct searches, or message friends of friends.


How to Meet Girls

  • Join groups
  • Conduct searches
  • Friends of Friends

Joining Groups

Joining groups generally applies to Facebook. However, following particular interests, celebs, etc. has a similar purpose on Instagram and Twitter.

Joining groups allows you to connect with people with a similar interest. This gives you an opportunity to interact based on something in common.

It also shows others who follow your feed what you like, and they will be more likely to reach out or respond if they enjoy some of the same things you do.

This is usually the best way to meet girls on social media, because it gives you an easy starting point.

It makes it easy to message a girl and say "I saw your post on (insert group, subject, etc.). I found it very interesting and would love to hear more about it."

You can also interact via public comments and then move the discussion to DMs.

Conduct Searches

I don't recommend this method, but if you have the time it's worth a shot. Messaging women out of the blue will likely have a low success rate.

To increase your chances, scroll through her feed and find something to talk about, then use a message similar to the one above.

Friends of Friends

For this method, you will scroll through your friend's friend lists. When you find someone you like, send them a message.

For example, "Hi. I noticed that you are friends with Dave. I've known him for years. How did you meet him?"

This again gives you some sort of common ground to build a conversation on, rather than feeling like a cold message from a stranger out of the blue.


Further Reading

Want to learn more about meeting women on social media? Check out these articles for more in depth steps and advice.


While social media isn't expressly for dating, it can certainly be used to meet women and find dates.

Have you met girls on Social Media? What techniques did you use? Let us know in the comments!

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