How To Date A Women If Your Shy
Depending on the women you are trying to seduce and attract shyness will either play with or against you. Many women find
shyness “cute” as it projects levels of intimacy and caring for others.
However, this cute cuddly and shy attraction very rarely leads to a sexual attraction. If you want to attract women with
sexual intimacy attached you will have to approach the game a little differently.
A shy nature makes dating women hard because:
You may fail to voice your valuable opinion due a lack of confidence.
You will certainly not project any sense of dominance within a social group (a key to female attraction)
You will hold back and not go out and meet new people which will reduce the chance of you finding love. Your friendship base shrinks which leads to less female encounters, as female exposure reduces approach anxiety increases.
Hence shyness compounds upon shyness and at the end of the road you feel helpless. Approaching and dating women is hard enough but how do you honestly go about acting alpha and confident when you are blatantly not.
It’s all well and good reading – you need to be more confident with women but how exactly do you go from shy boy to alpha male?
Becoming Confident With Women Is A Process
A process that can take time and effort but a journey which is rich in life rewards and extremely satisfying.
Dating women if your shy is kind of like going through the transition from boy to man. As you grow more confident in your own ability to date attractive women, or any women for that matter you will feel the shyness disappear.
Because you know you have a little more of what it takes you begin to speak up and value your own opinion.
Small confident steps at a time, a few mistakes and failures and before you know it your dating the women of your dreams.
But in the end the question still stands… How do I date women if I’m shy… Like really shy.
The way I see it you have two options.
Accept that your shyness is part of your nature, what makes you you and continue being shy. You will slowly grow confident over time. You will feel more comfortable because you have accepted who you are and now hang out with other shy people. You will likely find a shy women and the two of you will be very happy.
And yes there are shy women out there just like you afraid of approaching men! She would be delighted to finally find you and be comfortable in your presence. This option may sound like a copout but it should not.
I am not suggesting that you should not work on building your confidence, rather accepting who you are and what you want out of a partner. You should not feel pressured into thinking you have to perform confident “song and dances” in the clubs. That scene is not for everyone and is not as cool as you might think.
Find your own niche, find your own passion, and really nail it, be the best you can be at this new skill and confidence will be a natural progression like it should be.
It’s tough to act confident in an environment that is not suited for you to begin with. Let’s say you love computer games and find the thought of dancing in clubs terrifying.
Who said you had to go to clubs anyway?
No one is forcing you to feel anxious about dating, you might be choosing to put yourself in these situations.
Plus… have you noticed girls actually exist outside clubs and bars? And that talking and approaching women OUTSIDE of your area of anxiety is much more comfortable for you?
In this computer game example – perhaps you could find a women that also loves, say… just computers in general, or I.T. or technology. You know have mutual interests and conversation flows.
Note down the times and places where you feel more confident.
In option #1 PL suggests that you BE more of YOURSELF, forget about shyness and live your life where and how you want.
Option #2 too dating women when you are shy is the most classical approach. It suggests eliminating shyness and growing as a man by putting yourself in approach and women heavy situations more often. The more contact with women you have the less shy about the whole situation you will be…
There are MANY books and courses that suggest this approach as you do grow as a person faster and you are able to “get that girl”. DoubleYourDating is a classical example of a dating product that allows you to learn the techniques required to approach women successfully… Even if your a shy wuss
So option #2 recommends that you really get stuck into self help and confidence books. David Wygant and David Deangelo are great places to start when are on the lookout for more confidence in a hurry.
Understand before you get started that this is a bold move you are about to take and the transition from shyness to confidence with women will take time and effort. You might just get knocked around a few times but the hits make you stronger.
These two options are polar opposites and you may choose to use a mixture of the two.