Are you an introverted dater?
Don’t worry – you are not alone when it comes to being shy and introverted, most guys are when they are around attractive women.
Having an introverted personality is just as natural as having an extroverted personality. Remember women love to be listened to and introverted guys are great at asking insightful questions while actively listening!
You have it over extroverted guys who are too busy talking about themselves to realise what’s going on in their partners/dates mind. You should be able to really connect with women on a deeper level that extroverted guys ONCE you have mustered up the courage to approach.
Being a shy dater has big draw backs in that you don’t come across as being dominant or the leader or the group. This is a big cross against your name when it comes to attracting women.
But there’s more… Some areas of dating (night clubs, bars) are often DOMINATED by the flashy show off. The guy who is at a higher energy level than everybody else. You might just despise this flashy guy for not being genuine and not treating women properly but there is no question it works in that environment.
The online dating world is actually not that different, in this world of shameless self promotion and arrogance how does the modest man have a chance?
Well it’s quite obvious that you cannot compete and win against the ego’s of extroverted pigs.
According to ancient Chinese military genius Sun Tzu, “He who knows when he can fight and when he cannot will be victorious.”
I suggest you pick your battles. Fight on ground of which you feel confident, ensure you have a solid foundation and you are on the high ground rather than constantly fighting and jostling for position against stronger opposition.
There is more than one way to skin a cat my boy… I am grateful everyday that these alternative options that exist to every man that is willing to choose them.
Modesty And Passivity
Online dating has actually made is WAAAYY easier to find and date women than it used to be.
Even so you cannot expect to throw up a dating profile and expect the flood gates to open up. Emails won’t come flying into your inbox unless your a hot topless women. The fact that you are a timid guy means you have to get out there and make it happen. There should not be fear of rejection because you are just emailing women and saying hi… that is all. Don’t jump straight to “let’s meet up” just take it one small step at a time.
Yes you are modest
BUT you can’t afford to be passive and passivity is easy to get past with the help of online dating sites.
If you are shy you might find it hard to express yourself in a flashy or even an expressive way. You online dating profile is your chance to tell the world why you are such a great catch. However being low on confidence means you question your ability and personal attributes. Get help from friends or family.
They will let you know the sorts of benefits you can bring to a relationship. Your profile is not a place for lukewarm observations or half cooked passions. You really need to get some INTERESTED bullet points down. Dont be afraid to write your passions down no matter how weird they are. Dating sites are about finding compatible singles not attracting the norm. There will be a timid girl out there – if you can step out of your shell just a little bit you will find her waiting for you.
It is important to let a women know that you are shy so that they are aware of it before the date.
You are going to need to either brace your introverted nature or fight through it and try to be more extroverted.
If you want to stay as you are then embrace who you are and celebrate your attributes. Sell your good listening skills and emotional connectivity. Some women will really dig your vibe and be attracted to you.
Modest or quiet natures can often be mistaken for arrogance or even complete lack of interest. If you don’t recognise this you might find people acting strangely around you because you are not expressing yourself to them.
By being proud of your quiet nature you are outwardly suggesting that you are ok with yourself which is an attractive trait. People will begin to follow you for having the confidence to own up and accept yourself.