The psychology to self confidence with women
You can choose right now to be confident with women. I believe self confidence is 99% in your head. It is a function of past experiences yes… and creating new positive experiences will help you boost your self confidence with women.
But you must first decide that you are worthy of attention love and most of all authority.
Don’t expect to approach women with your same timid dull attitude and expect different results!
Even if you are an ugly nerd! You can STILL make it happen with women – by being arrogant and making light hearted humour of your situation you are letting everyone know in no uncertain terms that your situation, looks or stature will NOT have any bearing on your success in life.
Why does this work?
Because… People think of you what you think of yourself!
I am not referring to being arrogant but I am referring to being the real you – a confident worthy man.
IF you continue to feel sorry for yourself why should anyone else think otherwise?
Maybe you did have a rough childhood
Maybe kids did tease you… but until you take 100% responsibility for healing past wounds and increasing your confidence with women nothing will change. It comes down to believing that without a shadow of a doubt what you have to say it important and women do want to hear what you say.
Need speech lessons? Book them now starting tomorrow
Still having approach anxiety? Take the hits and practice until you get great – but not until you are prepared. Practice on kids males and older people first (not picking them up of course but just learning to converse naturally with people!)
Rather than seeking self approval from women, DEMAND respect by acting the right ways.
The secret is…
You shouldn’t be thinking about all of this when you are chatting and approaching women. It should just come natural – once you get great with women the conversation will flow naturally from one topic to the next.
Awkward silences wont feel awkward for you because you understand they are natural parts of conversation and great chances to use non verbal flirting and communication.
The problem is – for most guys this stuff just doesn’t come natural at all! Especially what you are trying to seduce a 9 or 10. How do you act natural and smooth without thinking about it?
I believe it comes down to your root psychology not with women but with yourself.
I believe that you first need to work on your own self worth and reframing before you can be great.
She is NOT thinking that your ugly or awkward
This is YOU telling yourself that you are unworthy of her love! Until you really understand what this means and how to fix it you will never be able act natural around women.
To often men will reframe any situation into a the negative to prove to themselves that what they are thinking is correct. It sounds crazy and I know you have heard all of this before but it’s really important.
Constant self dialogue (talking to yourself in your head) rather than living in the present (listening to what she is saying) will destroy any chances of acting natural.
Your brain can only focus on one thing at a time (really) so for Christ sake stop thinking she will shoot you down (even if she will), its not helping you in the present or the future.
I am not suggesting weird *think positive b.s.* I AM strongly advocating you look up from the ground and see the world for what it really is!
Are people laughing at you?
No didn’t think so… you can tick that off the list
Write down your other emotions that you feel during approach, they are ALL false!
Still looking at the ground and running over millions of possible negative scenarios?
LOOK UP open your eyes and focus on rational thought.
I believe you are thinking very irrationally at the moment. The situation with women is not as bad as you make it out to be.
Women are wonderful friendly people who just want a loving man to come up and have a friendly conversation with them.
Be that man! It’s easier than you think