Why Some Men Stay Single

photo by by Hamed Saber

There are to many dating sites to name now in operation from jewish , Christian and black dating to flings pet lovers and ugliness dating. Despite the abundance of tail about the virtual space singles are still having trouble getting together and making it happen.

This might just suggest the inherent flaws in our abilities to really find love.
Perhaps it’s not the dating sites at all but our:

Expectations, Conflicting personalities and emotions that are getting in the way.

According to the 2007 new York times article why are so many Americans single – half of all male Americans are either choosing to stay single or not great at dating and relationships.

I think men are drawn to being independent and there is something about being tied down that really grinds us.

Women have a tendency to change men over time – I know from studying several relationships in detail that men feel like women take away their choices and want to place rues and regulations on what they can and cant do.

Men, who love to feel independent and powerful often feel weak and powerless in a women’s presence. Especially if they have been going out for more than 2-3 years.

In fact it was very noticeable after 3 years of dating how the relationship dynamic changed. The women was no longer the cute and cuddly/sexy girl that he had started going out with but more the matriarchal leader of their little world.

He would start getting orders rather than suggestions and started to feel as though he wasn’t being respected whether it was in marriage or relationship.

This has got to be the biggest kick in the teeth for a man that has sacrificed 3 years of being single to be de-manned by a devil women looking to take over. Perhaps a little harsh but I know of many men that have felt taken over by marriage rather than exited about it.

They are just not taking control of the marriage and as a result the women steps and and takes on that leadership role.

I’m sure women do not mean to be so dominant in relationships over time… It’s almost as if they go through a mini menopause.

If you do want to be in a relationship and most men do… Then make sure you make a conscious effort to stand up set clear boundaries about how you should be treated. Do not misinterpret what I am saying here – I believe in all permutations of womens rights but I also believe in male rights.

There is such a thing as women not respecting men and what men do to support the family. If you believe she is not giving your the respect YOU deserve then all it takes is a meaningful conversation. If you have to read off some bullet points that you jotted down the previous  night.

Do not feel ashamed if your thinking about divorce – there is such a thing as a women not suited to long term marriage and you  might just have one.

Whether it be her fault or yours you need to sort out whatever is on your mind.

You might be a  guy that feels more at home when he is single and has the wind in his face. This is OK and you should  pursue whatever it is that makes you feel more alive. Not every man can stand the white picket fence and “perfect” home life.

Those that cant stand it but never do anything about it tend to lose their  manhood altogether and live a life of silent desperation.

You have seen these kinds of men around – perhaps it is you.

You can get your independence and life back of course and it starts with confronting your wife/gf and letting her know how you feel.

It could be something as simple as what you watch on telly or where you go for the holidays.

You might have unknowingly become completly unattractive to your girl as a result of not standing up and letting her put you in your place time and time again.

If it has got this bad then I urge you to stand up and become the single man that you once were. This does not mean you have to get a divorce but it may mean that you take a trip away by yourself (hunting fishing etc) and clear your head.

Some of the reasons why men stay single:

Independence

Inability to attract women

Insecurity about performance

Emotional and Personality issues conflicting with women

Drug abuse

Choice

Ability to have continuous sexual relationships with single women

Dislike of the female body

Work

Time

There will be many more reasons… Write yours in the comments below

Why do you choose to stay single?

  • I have chosen to stay single due to my obsession with my profession. I actually recently ended a decent relationship because it was a time drain. Staying single gives you a competitive edge in my line of work and I can easily pick up a woman when I want to get laid.